How to live a loving life

My friend, mentor, and coach Danny Friedland passed away last month after a year-long battle with brain cancer.  There was a moving memorial service for him on Saturday.  Here are eight brief reflections.

1: “Live a loving life” was Danny’s invitation to all who knew him.  His purpose was to “scale” the giving of love.  He encouraged us to say “I love you” to more of those people we love and care about.  I will.

2:  Danny’s preferred way to greet someone was to give them a hug.  But not just any hug.  He preferred to hug on the left side rather than the customary right because doing so makes it heart-to-heart.  Try it.

3: When Danny spoke with you, he focused all of his attention on you.   He was fully present, fully engaged.  That is one of the greatest goals for my life.  

4: Danny approached every conversation with an open heart.  He began each interaction by sharing his heartfelt appreciation for the other person or the group or the gathering.  Such a powerful way of being in the world.

5:  “Pause.  Notice.  Choose,” Danny would say.  There is a world of difference between reacting to circumstances and choosing our response to them. 

6:  When his sons would come to him with a problem or challenge, Danny wouldn’t give them an answer.  Rather, he’d provide a framework to enable them to make their own decision.  Parenting at its best.  

7: His younger son said during his eulogy, “My dad always wanted to be with me.  He always wanted to spend time with me.  He wanted to love me.”  So beautiful.  A high bar for all of us parents.

8: When his older son asked him how he could carry on his legacy and make Danny proud, he answered, “You already are.  All I ask is that you live a loving life.”

__________________________

Reflection:  What does it mean to live a loving life?

Action:  Do it.

To watch Danny’s memorial, click here. Note: service begins at 12:45 time marker.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *