1: Author Oliver Burkeman believes there are two basic orientations towards life.
We can either strive toward sanity.
Alternatively, we can operate from a position of sanity.
“The signature behavior of the striver-towards-sanity is ‘clearing the decks'”, Oliver writes in Meditations for Mortals
The striver-towards-sanity attempts “to deal with all the minor tasks tugging at our attention,” he notes, “in an effort to arrive at the point when we finally expect to have large stretches of time to focus on what we care about.”
The problem with this approach?
“The supply of things to fill the decks is to all intents and purposes limitless,” Oliver observes.
“So a commitment to clearing the decks leads inexorably to a life spent unendingly clearing the decks.”
Ouch.
We can, however, take an altogether different approach.
We can choose to “operate from sanity.”
Instead, we treat “the present moment as a place where peace of mind might, in theory, be attainable,” Oliver explains.
We no longer treat the activities of our lives as things we’re doing to reach sanity, one day, eventually.
As Richie Norton writes in his book Anti-Time Management, Step One is to “Decide who we want to be.”
Step Two is: “Act from that identity immediately.”
We embrace the idea that spending even thirty minutes today doing the actual thing is much more valuable than hundreds of hypothetical hours at a later date.
Does this mean we always feel calm or undistracted while doing any of this, especially at first?
Of course not.
We “might feel acutely anxious about the uncleared decks we’re ignoring,” Oliver points out.
“But the point of operating from sanity is to engage in the behaviors that constitute a meaningful life anyway, and to allow the feelings to follow, rather than spending our lives scrambling fruitlessly after the feelings.”
2: To operate from sanity, Oliver suggests we consider three useful techniques.
Technique #1: Deal with a backlog by isolating it.
“If we’ve accumulated an unpleasant backlog of email or other small tasks,” Oliver writes, “striving towards sanity might entail setting aside five whole days to do nothing but plow through all of it.”
What’s wrong with this tactic? It doesn’t work.
First, because it’s unlikely we’ll maintain our motivation.
And, second, “because other tasks and messages will accumulate in the meantime,” he notes, “leaving us no less backlogged than before.”
Instead, we follow the advice of time management expert Mark Forster, who recommends, “First, sequester all those emails in a separate folder, or the tasks on a separate to-do list. (And just like that, your inbox is empty!)
“Thereafter, our priority isn’t to blast through the backlog, but to stay up to date on new incoming emails or tasks, so as to prevent another backlog from developing.
“Chip away at the old one a little per day—or, if you think you can get away with it, just forget about it entirely.”
Technique #2: Free up time by renegotiating existing commitments, not just planning to make fewer.
What if what stands between us and peace of mind is a long list of commitments we wish we’d never made?
“Striving towards sanity would involve attempting to meet them all, while firmly resolving to make fewer new commitments from here on,” Oliver writes.
“Spoiler alert: we’ll make just as many as before.
“Operating from sanity,” he notes, “means biting the bullet and renegotiating some of the commitments that are already on our plate: Backing out of projects, requesting deadline extensions, or canceling social plans, so as to reduce the real, current demands on our time, not just hypothetical demands on it later.”
Technique #3: Treat our to-do list as a menu.
“In the striving-towards-sanity mindset,” Oliver observes, “a to-do list is always something we’ve got to get to the end of before we’re allowed to relax.”
Reality check. There are more things to be done than there is time available to do them.
So, instead, we choose to see our to-do list as a menu, “a list of tasks to pick from, rather than to get through,” he notes.
We acknowledge that we are unlikely to finish every item on our list. Then, we make selections from our menu.
“Obviously, not every task on every to-do list will be as appetizing as the restaurant analogy suggests,” Oliver notes. “But it’s surprising how many things do become more appetizing once we’re encountering them not as chores we have to plow through, but as options we get to pick.”
3: Getting better at getting better is what RiseWithDrew is all about.
Monday through Thursday, we explore ideas from authors, thought leaders, and exemplary organizations.
At the end of each week, we are exploring some of the life lessons Oliver shares in his wonderful book Meditations for Mortals.
Oliver explains that this mindset may feel awkward at first.
“Yet beneath the awkwardness, there’s often almost immediately a strange new kind of satisfaction,” he suggests.
We “feel more engrossed in our experience, and like we’re exerting more influence over the world, even though we’ve achieved that by relaxing rather than intensifying our attempts to feel in control of it.”
Does life suddenly become problem-free?
Ah, no.
“What’s more, we’re no longer so confident it ever will,” Oliver observes. “But our problems start to feel more tractable and interesting, and often enough we find we can approach them with relish.”
We’re not lying on a beach. Instead, we’re “striding over hills, with the wind and the rain in our face,” he notes. “Not effortless, maybe not even always that pleasant, in a conventional sense, but bracing, invigorating, and vital.”
More next week!
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Reflection: What would change in my day if I approached my tasks from a mindset of already being at peace, rather than trying to earn it by getting everything done?
Action: Experiment with treating my to-do list as a menu and intentionally select one or two tasks that align with the life I want to create.