1: What happens to your brain when you connect with someone or something bigger than yourself?

In moments like this, you experience “presence,” Daniel Coyle writes in his book Flourish: The Art of Building Meaning, Joy, and Fulfillment.

Lisa Miller, a psychologist at Columbia University, has spent years studying what happens in the brain during these deeper connections.

In one study, she tracked brain changes in twenty-seven people … continue reading

1: “Iain McGilchrist lives on the far edge of the Isle of Skye, off the coast of western Scotland, at the end of a one-lane, four-mile-long road,” Daniel Coyle writes in Flourish: The Art of Building Meaning, Joy, and Fulfillment.

These were the instructions Iain provided to Daniel, who was traveling to Scotland to conduct an interview: “At the bottom the road gives out. You are nearly at … continue reading

1: “Why does this matter to you?”

That’s the question author, consultant, and facilitator Peter Block asked Daniel Coyle

They had just met. Daniel, a writer, had set up an interview with Peter. They met at a coffee shop in Cincinnati, which is where Peter now calls home.

“A rangy eighty-five-year-old, Peter had settled into his chair and gave me a fond, knowing smile, as if we’d met each other … continue reading

1: Back in the early 2000s, a fatal shooting occurred in the Clifton Heights neighborhood of Cincinnati, Ohio.

“The community was disturbed and anxious, looking for answers,” Daniel Coyle writes in Flourish: The Art of Building Meaning, Joy, and Fulfillment.

A few days later, a local civic organization asked Peter Block, a neighborhood resident, to lead a public gathering. Peter is an author, consultant, and facilitator. For more … continue reading

1: You’re angry. Lately, it feels like Phil keeps leaving the toughest or most unpleasant tasks for you to handle.

How do you respond?

You vent to your friends about always being the one who has to clean up the messes.

But what is it that you don’t mention?

“That you smile broadly when your boss compliments you for your willingness to take on challenging jobs,” Joseph Grenny and his … continue reading

1: Marion spent 25 years working for the same organization.

“I was one move away from a cabinet-level position,” he recalls.

“However, no matter how many times I applied and interviewed for such positions, I was never selected.”

Being passed over made him mad.

So, what did he do next? He started telling himself what the authors of Crucial Conversations call “clever stories.”

“Clever stories justify our actions. They conveniently … continue reading

1: “It’s a shame that everyone else is an idiot,” Tynan writes in Superhuman by Habit.

Pause.

“Of course, it’s important to remember that to everyone else, you are the idiot.”

It all begins when we realize that being positive toward others is a habit we can develop.

Tynan tells a story about a disagreement he had with a cruise ship staff member after he felt he was charged … continue reading

1: Say you’re faced with a difficult challenge.

Or a big opportunity.

What if you approached it like a game?

This is the main idea behind Jane McGonigal’s SuperBetter framework, described in her book. It uses allies, quests, power-ups, bad guys, and epic wins to help you become more resilient and make real progress.

Yesterday, we looked at how radio producer Alex Goldman used SuperBetter to recover after … continue reading

1: Many people believe they are the only ones who don’t fit in.

“Feeling like you don’t belong can change how you interpret everything you experience,” writes Kelly McGonigal in her powerful book The Upside of Stress.

“Conversations, setbacks, misunderstandings,” she notes, “almost anything can be viewed as evidence that, in fact, you don’t belong.”

“The belief that you don’t belong also feeds into many destructive states of mind, … continue reading

1: What is the effect of showing smokers graphic warnings on cigarette packs?

When doctors are asked this question, “In general, they believe that the images will decrease smokers’ desire for a cigarette and motivate them to quit,” writes Kelly McGonigal in her terrific book The Upside of Stress.

Actually, studies show the warnings have the opposite effect.

“The most threatening images (say, a lung cancer patient dying in … continue reading