1: Things aren’t going well between Oba and Mari.
They’re about to have a crucial conversation, one where the stakes are high, opinions differ, and emotions run strong.
Oba: “Mari, I was wondering if we could talk about what happened on Friday night—you know, when you got home late from work and went straight to our room?”
Mari: “Oh, you mean Friday night when you were sitting on the couch … continue reading
1: Tom was at a crossroads.
He was 55 years old and had worked at the same engineering company for 17 years.
“Throughout my career I’ve faced recurring interpersonal conflicts that resulted from frequent ‘blowups,'” Tom shares in Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High, by Joseph Grenny, Kerry Patterson, and their co-authors.
Tom took pride in getting things done, even if his approach damaged … continue reading
1: You and your friends are at a karaoke bar on a Friday night.
The moment has arrived. It’s your turn to hit the stage and grab the mic.
Picture yourself saying, “I’m excited.”
Will you sing better if instead you say “I’m nervous”?
2: “Many people would probably say no, because we presume that singing ability is a stable skill, dependent on factors like experience, interest, and practice,” Daniel … continue reading
1: You’re angry. Lately, it feels like Phil keeps leaving the toughest or most unpleasant tasks for you to handle.
How do you respond?
You vent to your friends about always being the one who has to clean up the messes.
But what is it that you don’t mention?
“That you smile broadly when your boss compliments you for your willingness to take on challenging jobs,” Joseph Grenny and his … continue reading
1: Why pay attention to the stories you are telling yourself?
And why devote the time, effort, and energy to change these stories?
It’s not going to be easy, Crucial Conversations authors Joseph Grenny, Kerry Patterson, Ron McMillan, Al Switzler, and Emily Gregory warn us.
There are two reasons you may want to change the stories you are telling yourself:
Reason #1: Bad results.
Maybe you … continue reading
1: Interested in learning the secrets of life?
Searching for pure truth?
Would you like to fill your soul “with an understanding of love that knows no boundaries?” Diane Button asks in her book What Matters Most: Lessons the Dying Teach Us About Living.
Answers to these questions can come from spending time with those near death.
As an end-of-life doula, Diane spends many hours with people in their … continue reading
1: What’s the secret to a happy marriage?
Want to be thought of as more creative and effective at work?
Would you like to be less vulnerable to anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder?
Research shows there’s a simple way to increase the likelihood of these outcomes.
How? Simply increase the ratio of positive to negative emotions in your life.
“A myriad of studies show that having more positive emotions, … continue reading
1: “Why is it so hard to let go?” Marilyn said.
Marilyn was ninety-six years old. A naturally curious person, she had engaged Diane Button, an end-of-life doula, because she wanted to die well.
“She was willing and even excited to do the work to make that happen,” Diane writes in her wonderful book What Matters Most: Lessons the Dying Teach Us About Living.
Initially, Marilyn told Diane … continue reading
How to Promote Calm: Science-Backed Breathing
1: Stress gets a bad name.
Like many things in life, the Goldilocks rule applies here.
Too much stress. Not good. In fact, it will kill us.
But too little stress is not good either.
To perform at our best, we want to harness stress and use it to our advantage.
Or as Goldilocks says, “Not too hot. Not too cold. Just right.”
“Stress … continue reading
1: Ben Horowitz had been set up on a blind date by his friend and high school football teammate Claude Shaw.
It was the summer of 1986, and Ben had just finished his sophomore year of college at Columbia University and was living in Los Angeles with his father.
This would be a double date, and Ben and Claude decided to prepare an elaborate dinner for Claude’s girlfriend, Jackie Williams, … continue reading
