1: “How can I respect someone who behaves in ways I deplore?” Joseph Grenny, Kerry Patterson, and their co-authors ask in their classic book Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High.
“What do you do if you’re upset because another person has let you down?” they ask.
What if this behavior has happened repeatedly?
“How can you respect a person who is so poorly motivated … continue reading
1: “Respect is like air. As long as it’s present, nobody thinks about it.
“But if you take it away, it’s all that people can think about,” Joseph Grenny, Kerry Patterson, and their co-authors write in their classic book Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High.
“The instant people perceive disrespect in a conversation,” the authors observe, “the interaction is no longer about the original … continue reading
1: Imagine having a boss who regularly fails to keep commitments.
“How could you tell the boss you don’t trust him?” Joseph Grenny, Kerry Patterson, and their co-authors ask in their classic book Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High.
“Surely there’s no way to say this without him becoming defensive, right?”
Maybe. Maybe not.
The solution is to find what the authors call a … continue reading
1: It’s Friday night.
Mari works as a project manager for a global supply chain company. Oba is a chef.
It’s been a tough year for the couple.
“A recession triggered a restructuring in Mari’s company, and she was asked to take on additional responsibilities while downsizing her team,” Joseph Grenny, Kerry Patterson, and their co-authors write in their classic book Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes … continue reading
1: “Iain McGilchrist lives on the far edge of the Isle of Skye, off the coast of western Scotland, at the end of a one-lane, four-mile-long road,” Daniel Coyle writes in Flourish: The Art of Building Meaning, Joy, and Fulfillment.
These were the instructions Iain provided to Daniel, who was traveling to Scotland to conduct an interview: “At the bottom the road gives out. You are nearly at … continue reading
1: You’re angry. Lately, it feels like Phil keeps leaving the toughest or most unpleasant tasks for you to handle.
How do you respond?
You vent to your friends about always being the one who has to clean up the messes.
But what is it that you don’t mention?
“That you smile broadly when your boss compliments you for your willingness to take on challenging jobs,” Joseph Grenny and his … continue reading
1: “It’s a shame that everyone else is an idiot,” Tynan writes in Superhuman by Habit.
Pause.
“Of course, it’s important to remember that to everyone else, you are the idiot.”
It all begins when we realize that being positive toward others is a habit we can develop.
Tynan tells a story about a disagreement he had with a cruise ship staff member after he felt he was charged … continue reading
1: Say you’re faced with a difficult challenge.
Or a big opportunity.
What if you approached it like a game?
This is the main idea behind Jane McGonigal’s SuperBetter framework, described in her book. It uses allies, quests, power-ups, bad guys, and epic wins to help you become more resilient and make real progress.
Yesterday, we looked at how radio producer Alex Goldman used SuperBetter to recover after … continue reading
1: “There’s nothing in the world I hate more than asking for help,” Alex Goldman said.
Alex is a public radio producer in New York City who loves cycling.
“In the summer of 2011, he suffered a terrible accident when he was knocked off his bike and run over by a car,” Jane McGonigal writes in her book SuperBetter: The Power of Living Gamefully.
“I had multiple fractures in … continue reading
1: Many people believe they are the only ones who don’t fit in.
“Feeling like you don’t belong can change how you interpret everything you experience,” writes Kelly McGonigal in her powerful book The Upside of Stress.
“Conversations, setbacks, misunderstandings,” she notes, “almost anything can be viewed as evidence that, in fact, you don’t belong.”
“The belief that you don’t belong also feeds into many destructive states of mind, … continue reading
