How often do we show up as the Persecutor? The Rescuer? The Victim?
1: Back in 1968, Harvard Professor Stephen Karpman introduced a concept called the Drama Triangle.
“The Drama Triangle consists of the three roles people tend to take when they feel threatened—Persecutor, Victim, or Rescuer—to deal with their underlying feelings of stress or self-doubt,” writes Dr. Daniel Friedland in Leading Well from Within.
“The Persecutor, whether a … continue reading
Dr. Daniel Friedland believes asking questions of ourselves is a crucial strategy to living a better life. Â
He outlines a four-step approach to help cultivate this mindset in his book Leading Well from Within: A Neuroscience and Mindfulness-Based Framework for Conscious Leadership. “More specifically, these steps cultivate our challenge response to stress, which helps us lean into our circumstances mindfully, with openness and curiosity, and leverage our stress and … continue reading
Turns out that is the wrong question to ask, Dr. Daniel Friedland writes in Leading Well from Within.
Instead, we want to focus on creating the optimal brain conditions so that the answers will find us.
So far this week, we focused on learning to ask the right questions. Step two involves finding more inspiring answers.
“Two factors are key for creating optimal conditions to find answers internally,” … continue reading
1: When Dr. Daniel Friedland would lead workshops, he would ask attendees to close their eyes and pay attention to the feelings in their bodies. Â
He would then “instruct them to say three firm ‘no’s’ silently in their mind, much like their parents may have told them as a child,” he writes in Leading Well from Within. “I invite them to notice whatever physical sensations, feelings, or thoughts they … continue reading
1: Dr. Daniel Friedland knew he had made a mistake. A big mistake. Â
He awoke “with the painfully familiar sense of depression,” Danny recalls in Leading Well from Within: A Neuroscience and Mindfulness-Based Framework for Conscious Leadership. “I believed I’d made a terrible decision.”
Danny was a leading expert on evidence-based medicine (EBM), which had become the “gold standard by which all healthcare decisions are made,” he writes. He … continue reading
Conflict arises because one or both people are not getting their needs met, Dr. Daniel Friedland tells us in his wonderful book Leading Well from Within. “We may feel unheard, unsafe, or uncared for regarding what is truly important to us.”
Yesterday, we looked at how a father rebuilt his relationship with his son.
How did he do it?
It’s not complicated. It’s not high-level math. The dad began by … continue reading
1: Eric and his son Tony had an awful relationship.
Eric’s wife had left the family when Tony was eleven years old. The young boy had felt abandoned. “He became angry, irritable, and depressed,” writes Dr. Daniel Friedland in Leading Well from Within: A Neuroscience and Mindfulness-Based Framework for Conscious Leadership.
“Eric, who struggled with his own doubts of self-worth, found it difficult to empathize with Tony as a … continue reading
1: Dr. Mike noticed something was changing with his patients. As a pediatrician, he had a busy, demanding schedule.
“I have noticed,” he emailed Dr. Daniel Friedland, “I am seeing patients who are much more tolerant of me being late. Also, they are happier with the advice I give.”
The kicker? “Patients seem more likely to follow the advice given,” he wrote.
What’s going on here? What is causing this … continue reading
The year was 1848. One of the most momentous discoveries about the part of the brain called the Prefrontal Cortex (PFC) was about to occur.
1: Phineas Gage was the foreman for a railway crew in central Vermont. He and his team were using gunpowder to blast through a rocky hilltop. As Phineas was loading some gunpowder, he accidentally dropped his tamping iron, initiating an explosion.
“The thirteen-pound, three-a-half-foot tamping … continue reading
The world today has been described as “VUCA.” Which stands for Volatility, Uncertainty, Complexity, and Ambiguity.
It’s easy to get triggered, to feel threatened, and to live with a “reactive mindset,” Dr. Daniel Friedland writes in Leading Well from Within.
There is another option, however. Despite this “VUCA reality,” we can choose instead to live with a proactive or “creative mindset.”
“The essence of being proactive is to take … continue reading
