1: Question: What’s the best way to boost the confidence of young scholars suffering from imposter syndrome?
It’s not what we might think.
When sociologists Jessica Collett and Jade Avelis paired entry-level academic women with experienced, inspirational mentors, they discovered an unwelcome irony: The younger scholars felt “more insecure and inadequate, through negative comparison with their uber-accomplished elders,” Oliver Burkeman writes in Meditations for Mortals.
One of the young scholars stated that she “suspected that her mentor was secretly Superwoman,” the report explained. “How could she ever live up to that example?”
Instead, what works is “to encourage mentors to be more candid about their own failures and struggles,” Oliver explains.
“True confidence is kindled,” he notes, “not by witnessing it in others, but by realizing we aren’t alone in lacking it.”
2: We’ve likely heard about Steve Jobs‘ famous 2005 commencement speech at Stanford during which the Apple founder encouraged his audience to look for work they love, and never to settle for less.
“On the face of it, [Steve] generously treats every one of his listeners as potential world-changers and billionaires,” Oliver writes.
“Yet there’s real pressure in Jobs’s supposedly inspiring exhortation to keep striving to find your unique purpose,” he observes, “the kind of pressure we could easily imagine inhibiting some listeners from forging a bold path through life, instead of encouraging them to do so, out of fear that they might not measure up.”
Steve’s career advice is an example of what the Christian writes David Zahl calls “high anthropology,” wherein we “focus optimistically on the great things we expect from others and from ourselves.
“High anthropology views people as defined by their best days and greatest achievements, their dreams and their aspirations,’ David observes.
He contrasts this view with “low anthropology,” which is captured by essayist Anne Lamott‘s observation: “Everyone is screwed up, broken, clingy, and scared, even the people who seem to have it more or less together. They are much more like us than we would believe. So try not to compare our insides to their outsides.”
“Low anthropology assumes,” he notes, “a through line of heartache and self-doubt, [and] that the bulk of our mental energy is focused on subjects that would be embarrassing or even shameful if broadcast.”
The problem with high anthropology?
“All too often [it] leads to anxiety, judgment, resentment and burnout,” David explains.
Compare this with our response to Ann’s insight. We “feel our shoulders unknot,” he writes. The pressure fades away. “What sound insulting is actually liberating.”
3: This liberation impacts not just our ability to relax.
We are also free to act.
“Knowing that I needn’t project a facade of flawless competence,” Oliver writes, “before I can start daunting work or reach out to others because I understand that everyone else has a similarly messy inner world leaves me far more likely to do so.”
Are there other benefits to adopting this mindset?
Yes. We are also more likely to see others in a more positive light.
“Something about the fact that we’re all in the same predicament leaves me feeling supported by others in what I do,” Oliver notes, “rather than engaged in stress-inducing, zero-sum competition against them.”
More next week!
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Reflection: Who around me would benefit from hearing my honest struggles and setbacks, rather than just my highlights and successes?
Action: Share one recent challenge or moment of self-doubt with a peer or mentee to foster real connection and confidence.
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