1: This week, we’ve been exploring author Kim Scott‘s ideas around what she calls “Radical Candor.”
Which is also the title of her book: Radical Candor: Be a Kick-Ass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity.
Radical candor involves two critical elements, Kim explains: Care personally and Challenge directly.
That’s what radical candor is.
2: What about what it is not?
“Radical Candor is not a license to be gratuitously harsh or to ‘front-stab,” Kim writes.
“It’s not Radical Candor just because we begin with the words, ‘Let me be Radically Candid with you,'” and then follow up with a statement like “You are an idiot.”
That’s not being radically candid. That’s being a jerk.
“Radical Candor is also not an invitation to nitpick,” Kim observes. “Do it only for things that matter.”
Because challenging people directly takes effort. For ourselves and for those we are challenging. To warrant the investment of energy, the payoff needs to be real.
3: We begin with the caring personally side of the equation. Only after we’ve made some meaningful deposits are we able to make a withdrawal.
“A good rule of thumb for any relationship is to leave three unimportant things unsaid each day,” she reminds us.
Caring personally is not “about schmoozing, nor is it about endless extroversion that exhausts the introverts on your team or wears us out if we happen to be the introvert,” Kim notes.
“It’s not about getting drunk or driving go-carts or playing laser tag or having endless dinners with colleagues,” she writes.
“Those might be good ways to blow off steam, but activities like that take up a lot of time and are not the most efficient way to help us get to know the people we work with, or show them you care personally.”
It’s much more simple than that.
“Radical Candor works,” she suggests, “only if the other person understands that our efforts at caring personally and challenging directly are delivered in good faith.”
It’s also not “one size fits all.” It requires emotional intelligence. “We have to be constantly aware,” Kim reminds us, “of the fact that what seemed Radically Candid to one person or team may feel too obnoxious (or too touchy-feely) to another.”
More tomorrow.
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Reflection: What comes more naturally for me: Caring personally or challenging directly? How might I use these two approaches in tandem to become a better leader?
Action: Journal about my answers to the questions above.
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