1: “If you approach a negotiation thinking that the other guy thinks like you, you’re wrong,” Chris Voss writes in his book Never Split the Difference.
“That’s not empathy; that’s projection.”
Chris is the FBI’s former chief hostage negotiator. He has also taught business negotiation in MBA programs at USC and Georgetown. During the third week of his negotiations class, he has his students play what he calls the … continue reading
1: “We’re always taught to look for the win-win solution, to accommodate, to be reasonable,” Chris Voss writes in his book Never Split the Difference.
We’re taught wrong.
“The traditional negotiating logic that’s drilled into us from an early age, the kind that exalts compromises, says, ‘Let’s just split the difference,'” he observes. “Then everyone’s happy.”
What does Chris think of this logic?
“No. Just, simply, no,” he notes.… continue reading
1: “Give us the money,” the kidnappers told the nephew of a prominent Haitian political figure, “or your aunt is going to die.”
It was Monday morning in Port-au-Prince, Haiti’s capital. The year was 2004.
The nephew called the FBI office. Chris Voss, the FBI’s lead international kidnapping negotiator, came onto the line.
“He spoke so fast he had to repeat his story three times before I understood,” Chris … continue reading
1: Jessica had a problem.
As a sales representative for a large pharmaceutical company, “she was trying to sell a new product to a doctor who used similar medication,” Chris Voss writes in Never Split the Difference.
The doctor was the single largest user of this kind of medication in the entire territory.
“The sale was critical to her success,” Chris notes.
Jessica’s goal? Convince the doctor to try … continue reading
1: Brandon Voss was six foot two and weighed 250 pounds.
What did he like most about high school football?
He liked to hit people.
“He loved to knock every player wearing an opposing jersey to the ground,” writes Chris Voss in his book Never Split the Difference. Chris is the FBI’s former chief hostage negotiator and Brandon’s dad.
Brandon’s senior year, his coach moved him to linebacker from … continue reading
Behavior change is hard.
“Consider the typical patient with severe coronary heart disease recovering from open-heart surgery,” Chris Voss writes in Never Split the Difference.
“This surgery isn’t a cure,” the surgeon tells the patient. “The only way to truly prolong your life is to make the following behavior changes . . .”
“Yes, yes, yes, of course, Doctor! This is my second chance. I will change!” the patient … continue reading
1: August 2000. The Philippines. The militant Islamic group Abu Sayyaf announces it has captured a CIA agent.
“The truth was not as newsworthy or as valuable to the rebels,” writes Chris Voss in Never Split the Difference. The Muslim rebels had actually apprehended Jeffrey Schilling, a twenty-four-year-old California native traveling near their base in Jolo Island.
The rebel leader Abu Sabaya announced the ransom amount.
$10 million.… continue reading
1: Marti Evelsizer was the FBI’s Crisis Negotiation Coordinator in Pittsburgh.
She was “a dynamo and a negotiating genius, which earned her huge respect both within the Bureau and with the local police,” writes Chris Voss in his book Never Split the Difference.
The city’s police department’s hostage negotiation team asked her to sit on their selection board for new candidates. It was quite an honor.
The only problem? … continue reading
1: Chris Voss has recently joined the FBI’s New York office, he writes in his book Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if Your Life Depended On It.
“I want to be a hostage negotiator,” Chris told Amy Bonderow, who ran the FBI’s Crisis Negotiation Team in New York.
“Everyone does—got any training?” she asked.
“No,” Chris said.
“Any credentials?”
“Nope,” he answered.
“Any experience?” she asked.
“No,” … continue reading
1: Getting better at getting better is what RiseWithDrew is all about.
Monday through Thursday, we explore ideas from authors, thought leaders, and exemplary organizations. On Friday, I share something about myself or what we are working on at PCI.
This week we’ve been exploring ideas and lessons around becoming a better negotiator from Chris Voss, the FBI’s lead hostage negotiator, and his book Never Split the Difference… continue reading
