1: “When Alan Silva was 14 years old he was in love with the movies,” Robert Waldinger and Marc Schulz write in The Good Life: Lessons from the World’s Longest Scientific Study of Happiness.
Alan was one of 456 inner-city Boston boys selected to participate in what became known as the Harvard Study of Adult Development.
“They were children who grew up in some of Boston’s most troubled families and most disadvantaged neighborhoods,” Bob and Marc write, “but who, at age 14, had mostly succeeded in avoiding the paths to juvenile delinquency that some of the their peers were following.”
In the summer of 1942, Alan got a job shining shoes in Thompson Square to earn money to go to the movie theater in Charlestown and spend his afternoon with James Cagney or Susan Hayward.
“He’d go with friends,” the authors note, “and when they weren’t around, he’d go by himself. He’d see every movie twice, and if it wasn’t good, the second time he’d complain to the ticket taker.”
Some days, as Alan returned home, he would stop by the Charlestown marina, where he was a member of the Community Sailing Club, a local organization where kids could learn to sail.
“If nothing too interesting was happening at the marina he’d head up to Chelsea Street,” they note, “and wait for the right kind of delivery truck to drive by—one with a handrail on the back—so he could sneak up behind the hop and a ride home.”
That part was a secret.
“He doesn’t do any truck hopping,” his mother told the Harvard Study. “I’ve warned him about losing his legs.”
2: The Harvard Study included two groups. In addition to the inner city Boston group, there were also 268 sophomores at Harvard College.
The Boston group comprised boys like Alan, most of whom lived in poverty.
Alan’s father had emigrated from Portugal and worked as a machinist at the Boston Navy Yard. He made just enough money to keep food on the table.
“Alan, an excitable, busy kid,” Bob and Marc write, “was blissfully unaware of the financial stress his parents experienced.”
The researcher who did the initial interview described Alan as “wildly adventurous.”
“He comes running in all out of breath,” his mother said, “and then he just talks talks talks.”
Alan’s mother was not as authoritarian as his grandmother, who also lived with the family in their three-room apartment and was afraid he would get into the wrong group and start stealing.
“I’m not too strict,” his mother said. “I let him do what other kids do. It’s normal. My mother was too strict and it made me moody. Now I read child psychology books.”
3: Alan was also ambitious. “If he wasn’t at the movies or sailing or hopping trucks,” Bob and Marc write, “he was home tinkering with an Erector Set that his father bought him for Christmas. He wanted to learn everything he could about building things. He believed he had control over his life, which also led him to believe something many of the other Boston kids in the Study didn’t: that he could go to college.”
The Boston men and the Harvard men were different in many ways.
“Taken together,” the authors note, “the two reflect some hard realities about the effect of poverty and the differences in life outcomes between the working class and the professional class.
“But certain relational advantages retain their power across this socioeconomic divide.
“In Alan Silva’s case, he had a mother who loved him; she advocated for him, believed in him, and supported his aspirations,” they write. “Thanks in part to her encouragement and support, Alan Silva was one of the few Boston men who went to college.
“Shortly after graduating with a degree in electrical engineering he was hired by the telephone company and had a long career, retiring at 56.”
Fast forward almost forty years. “At 95, Alan doesn’t care for new movies, but he catches some of his old favorites on TV,” Bob and Marc report.
“When we asked him in 2006 what he was most proud of in his life, he did not talk about his career or his college degree.”
“We’ll be married forty-eight years this year,” Alan shares. “Children turned out good and grandchildren, too. I’m proud of my family.”
Bob and Marc reflect: “Alan’s story brings to life the lessons of the Harvard Study on the power of relationships, and it reminds us of an important truth: all of us have a rich mix of things we can’t control and things we can. Each of us must find ways to work with the hand we’re dealt.”
More tomorrow.
_________________________
Reflection: What lessons do I take from Alan’s story? How might I apply these lessons?
Action: Discuss with a family member or friend.
What did you think of this post?
